As the New Year approached, Judy, a dog mom, thought about the goals she wanted to set. Her thoughts kept circling back to Honey, her loyal golden retriever, who struggled with separation anxiety every time Judy left the house. Honey would pace, wide-eyed with distress, whenever she sensed Judy was about to leave—despite the joy of being together, leaving Honey alone always worried Judy.
The festive season inspired Judy and motivated her to make this year different. She pictured Honey as a calm and happy pup, no longer afraid of being alone. But she knew this wouldn’t be a quick fix. She took on the challenge, taking a deep breath, knowing it would require consistent effort and patience.
Every day brought new challenges and small wins as Judy and Honey worked together. With determination, Judy set out on this mission to help Honey, hoping she’d find comfort and peace one day, even when Judy wasn’t home.
Can you relate to Judy and Honey? If yes, here's a guide to setting realistic goals for tackling your dog's separation anxiety this year.
Why Patience and Realistic Expectations Matter
Setting the right pace should be your first goal when dealing with dog separation anxiety. We all wish for a quick fix, but calming your dog down is gradual. The answer lies in celebrating small wins—like your pup staying chill for just a few minutes alone. Over time, these little victories boost your dog’s confidence and pave the way for lasting calm.
Building Calm, One Small Step at a Time
To help a dog with separation anxiety, start by setting small, realistic goals to build their comfort from the ground up. Many dogs panic super quickly, sometimes even before you leave the room. So, begin with short moments apart, like a minute or two, and watch closely. Food can be a good distraction, but it's not a foolproof measure of progress. Even if a dog munches on a treat, the real "alone time" starts once it's done. Instead, focus on how the dog reacts, not just how long they seem to chill. Gradually increase the time by tiny steps, always keeping an eye on their comfort level. Slow and steady does the trick, helping your dog feel that being alone is safe and manageable.
Use Measurable Milestones to Track Progress
Try setting weekly or monthly goals to track your dog's progress, but always let them set the pace. Aiming to add 5 minutes of alone time each week gives you a target, but keep it flexible. If your dog seems stressed, take it slower and adjust.
The main thing is to make gradual progress that respects your dog's comfort. Going at their pace builds trust and helps them feel secure at every step.
A handy way to see how far your dog has come is to use a “calm journal,” where you can jot down what works, any challenges you encounter, and those moments of progress. This method helps you celebrate the victories and highlights patterns that may help refine your approach.
Plus, it’s fun to look back on your progress. You might think you’ll remember everything, but think again. You have too many other things to think about, and memories—even the most wonderful ones—are known to play tricks on people. A journal is the perfect solution.
The Power of a Routine in Reducing Dog Anxiety
This little change can do wonders for your dog’s calmness and confidence. Dogs love routine, and a regular schedule can help with separation anxiety. Try to have meals, walks, and training sessions at the same time daily. When your dog knows what’s coming, it increases trust and stability.
Gradual Alone Time to Ease Separation Anxiety
Sudden time alone can be overwhelming for dogs with separation anxiety. Instead, ease into it by leaving the room for a few minutes and extending it as your dog’s comfort increases.
Gradual desensitization, where you leave the house briefly and then return calmly, can help reduce anxiety over time. Remember, each successful solo moment builds trust, so keep these introductions smooth and positive.
Expect Setbacks
Setbacks are normal in dealing with separation anxiety, especially with changes or extra excitement at home. If you notice your dog pacing, whining, or chewing, it might be time to slow things down. Try switching it up with a calming toy or soft music to help soothe your pup without overwhelming them. Stay flexible and adjust your approach to keep the vibe positive.
Celebrate Your Dog’s Wins Over the Year
Let’s celebrate steps toward a happier, calmer pup this New Year! As time progresses, take a moment to reflect on your dog's progress towards becoming more relaxed. Those small wins might seem minor, but they're a big deal!
New Year + Small Wins = Big Success! Here's to celebrating every step forward and making this year amazing!
Give your pups a treat from me!
Stephanie
About Stephanie Barger, Canine Zen
Stephanie Barger is a dog trainer specializing in separation anxiety and behavior modification. She spent the early years of her career teaching humans before transitioning to dog training over a decade ago. Her passion is helping you and your dog live more harmoniously together.
The name of her business, Canine Zen, embodies her approach to life with our dogs. She recognizes that dogs are living, breathing, sentient, social beings that need human support, compassion, and understanding to live beside us in our strange human world. She shows people how to effectively communicate with their dogs and understand what their dogs are trying to say to them. She strives to provide a safe environment for dogs and humans to learn and thrive together without fear, pain, or judgment.
If your life with your dog is not what you anticipated and "nothing has worked" to change things, Stephanie can help you understand and work with your dog to achieve your goals and a better life together. She is an amazing teacher, works compassionately with humans and dogs, and provides practical solutions for your dog training needs. Her goal is to calm the chaos in your home.
Feel free to contact Stephanie if you want to transform your relationship with your dog and create a more harmonious home. You can also ask questions in the comment box below.
Free Discovery Call with Stephanie: https://train.caninezen.com/book-discovery-call-page
Stephanie Barger and Canine Zen's links/handles:
Facebook (personal): https://www.facebook.com/StephanieBarger67
Facebook (business): https://www.facebook.com/caninezenusa/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/caninezen/
Stephanie Barger’s Certifications/Organizational Affiliations:
Certified Separation Anxiety Trainer (CSAT)
Certified Behavior Consultant (CBCC-KA)
Certificate of Completion-Aggression in Dogs Master Class
Fear Free Certified Professional (FFP-Trainer)
Certified Professional Dog Trainer (CPDT-KA)
Member of the Association of Professional Trainers (APT)
Member of the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants (IAABC)
Member of the Pet Professional Guild (PPG)
Alignable Ambassador: Alliance of Central NM
Alignable Group Co-Leader: Pet Industry Group
Owner/Operator of Canine Zen LLC
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